Photo by Tess Kincaid: Merchant Seafarers' War Memorial, Cardiff
Where
are we?
blinded
and
betrayed
by time,
endless skies
press down
with the
weight of water.
Sanded and
salted, preserved,
we thought,
like a pearl of great price
lamented
but unfound and scattered
so my ribs
no longer know each other.
Over at the Imaginary Garden Margaret asked us to "play it again" with a previous prompt. I chose a form called an Etheree, an unrhymed syllable
counting form, beginning with a first line of one syllable, and continue for ten lines increasing
the syllable count by one each line, as follows: 1/2/3/4/5/6/7/8/9/10. The image is from Tess Kincaid at
Magpie Tales and is also posted there. Please follow the links to both of these outstanding writing sites.
Yes, perfect blend of these two prompts. Nicely done!
ReplyDeleteI can feel the weight of both skies and water. Really tight write.
ReplyDeleteOh, I love the sanded and salted~ Your ending really brings the weight to life~ Well Done
ReplyDeleteLovely take on the prompt
ReplyDeleteA moving interpretation of the picture and excellent use of the etheree.
ReplyDeletelamented but unfound and scattered
ReplyDeleteso my ribs no longer know each other"...... absolutely lovely.
An excellent response to the prompt :D
ReplyDeleteBeautifully executed :D
Lots of love,
Sanaa
nice images!
ReplyDelete"Sanded and salted, preserved"...i like the expectation and feeling in this...
ReplyDeleteLovely write. Favorite line: "Sanded and salted, preserved".
ReplyDeletepreserved with sand in not so fun places? lol
ReplyDeleteEvery word counts in this dark picture you paint.
ReplyDeleteYour closing!! I love this focus and form, Mary!
ReplyDeleteBeautifully woven words!
ReplyDeleteBeautifully written , IronBorn
ReplyDelete" preserved,
ReplyDeletewe thought, like a pearl of great price"
Ah, there's the rub. That image ... so many soldiers - MIA, etc., beneath heavy skies, waters.... You say so much with so little. Excellent, as usual.
loved this writing style
ReplyDeleteAshamed
Lovely form; the progression adds suspense to the question, to the need to know...
ReplyDeleteThis is a masterpiece ....
ReplyDeleteVery nice...and I like the form too...
ReplyDeleteeffortless form, and that clincher line... ~
ReplyDeleteonly the earth knows all the locations of his once powerful body
ReplyDelete