Sunday, May 6, 2012

Back Waters



Step out the door and back in time
to Grafton when I’m only nine,
beyond the lonely the cul-de-sac
the river ran along the back 
                         of our lot line.

A magic place to be a child
where wizards, trolls and faeries wild
kept hid amid the river banks,
and exploits worth the scolds and spanks
                         always beguiled.

So out that door and back in time
to Grafton when I’m only nine,
beyond the lonely cul-de-sac.
But unable to venture back, 
                         memory’s sublime.  

Image by R. Stainforth, River Irwell

This poem was inspired by the image of the River Irwell found at The Mag which looks so very much like the Milwaukee River that went past my childhood home.  The form called called Florette comes from IGRT.  And if you follow each of these links you will be in for treat. Very briefly though, the form consists of  Rhyme scheme: a, a, a, b, b/a; Syllable count: 8, 8, 8,12 
(fourth line has an internal rhyme of b on syllable 8, with the final rhyme a.  And the poem should consist of two or more stanzas.  

xxxxxxxa
xxxxxxxa
xxxxxxxb
xxxxxxxbxxxa

70 comments:

  1. I love how the picture took you back, and this form offered you a way to explore those memories.
    Thank you for participating in a Real Toads challenge.

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    1. Thank you Kerry, it's great to be back!

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  2. I too grew up near the river, two infact, and I recreated Huckfinn and davy crockett more times than I can recall. What wondrous memories.
    Oh and thanks for introducing me to Florette.... I'll try my hand.
    rel

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    1. Ah, what fun! I hope you check out the link to Imaginary Garden with Real Toads (IGRT). It's a very nice site, and gives a more thorough explanation of the form.

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  3. Such delightful memories...and use of the poetic form

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    1. Thanks Susie. I didn't have a perfect childhood, but I think it was damn close.

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  4. This is lovely, Mary and so so evocative. There was certainly no river near where I grew up, but I had all those same ideas every time I got near one and your poem was like reading a memory of that.

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    1. Thanks Ben, I'm glad it evoked some good memories.

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  5. A memorable trip
    And your rhymes were hip
    The cat did a flip
    Like he got into cat nip

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    1. I'm sure there was some cat nip growing on the river banks Pat. lol

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  6. I know that river! A beautiful florette...love your nostalgic poem.

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  7. Delicious and exquisite poem.

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  8. nice...love the magic of childhood you evoke in the middle stanza...where i grew up has some of that same magic as well...and the rhyme scheme is rather enchanting..

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    1. Thanks Brian, glad you shared the magic :o)

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  9. excellent! there was a river, nah, a "crick" running behind my house growing up, too. this rings so true and the form is very subtle here. nice!

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    1. Thank you Marian, there something so special about the water.

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  10. My favorite this week.....
    Who wouldn't want to live with the faeries...?

    re: Word of the Day:
    YAYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYY!

    ;)

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  11. Sounds like a wonderful childhood. This is great, Mary.

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    1. Thanks Laurie - I had sooo much good in the hood, I can't complain (but sometimes I still do...like Joe Walsh). lol

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  12. I like the fairy world that you invited. I can I go there with you sometime :)
    http://leah-jamielynn.typepad.com/blog/

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  13. i like how you captured the magic in this scene

    the river

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  14. Ah, memory. A magical poem. I'd like to be taken back to places myself; this renewed the impulse! Beautiful, beautiful, beautiful.

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  15. That's really an interesting rhyme scheme and lends itself well to your subject matter.

    Quite lovely!

    =)

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  17. Memories of wonder you seem to have not lost!
    PS. Don't go back. It all looks smaller! :-)

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    1. Yes, faulty memory often improves the past ;-)

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  18. So glad I read yours after I posted mine, or I would have chucked it! This is just perfect. I love it!

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  19. Perfect form and words ~ I like the memories of the river ~

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  20. Love it Mary--I'm about ready to go pull mine down, after reading everyone else's. This one is especially fluid and lovely.

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  22. I love rhyme and with two more it would be a sonnet.

    I greatly enjoyed this and love rhymes, word play and all the standard tools of the trade that folks ought to use more often but they feel it's not 'in style'.

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  23. This just lovely. It flows like that river. And I'm really impressed with the rhyme. Well done.

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  24. This form, allows expression to flow in and out of text, like ripples in a river. I loved the time travel, the fantasy and reality woven together through your imagery. Your poem is artistically crafted and a joy to read. Thank you for sharing, Mary. =D

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  25. wow. three stanzas that all connected. amazing. i had a hard enough time writing just one. i'm jealous!!

    stock market robots

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  26. Oh absolutely, because we all do know back then was such a delightful time!

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  27. This is a quite lovely poem and very evocative, especially so, because R.D.Stainforth is from the North of England and I think, but not absolutlely sure that his picture is the Irwell which bisected my brthplace, Bury, in the County Palatine of Lancaster!
    Many thanks, Mary.

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    1. Ah, thank you Doctor. It's a lovey river, I hope you have wonderful memories of it and your childhood too.

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  28. This is perfect for both prompts! I love the nostalgic quality.

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  29. Lovely...you took me there...this one is begging to be set to music...

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  30. Thank you Tess - I wish I was more musical (despite my name, I'm not very).

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  31. Lovely poem , Mary! Deep rabbit hole for me.
    Cold Chisel " Flame Trees" song , describing the northern river town of Graftons blazing Jacaranda and Kurrajongs in spring.
    The band also recalled Elspeth Huxleys "Flame Trees of Thika" . She was Aldous Huxleys cousin and Thomas Huxleys grandaughter
    Thomas Huxley, "Darwins Bulldog" for his fierce support of the theory of evolution .he was assistant surgeon on the HMS Rattlesnake , sent to explore around Australia and New Guinea, wow.
    Thanks.

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    1. Wow right back atcha! I'm glad this sent you down a rabbit hole, and not after a red herring :o)

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  32. Great use of rhyme and rhythm.

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    1. Thank you Dave. It's a new form for me, sort of fun.

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  33. exploits worth the scolds and spanks

    What a great picture this paints, Mary! You must have enjoyed your childhood. ♥

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    1. Thank you Jinksy. And you're right, I managed to have quite a bit of fun :o)

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  34. Oh, yes!!! This is a lovely nostalgic florette!! I love this line:

    "where wizards, trolls and faeries wild
    kept hid amid the river banks,"

    I love the magical feeling of this part! Smiles!!

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  35. This is a beautiful memory relived in poetry Mary! :-)

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  36. Seeing this form got me interested... Lovely poem, thanks.

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  37. The resilient & mischievious age, that 9.

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  38. Thanks guys <3 - sorry I didn't see your comments sooner!

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