Thursday, September 3, 2015

Night Tones

    Nocturne in Grey and Silver by Jame McNeill Whistler


Dark walls of water
and sea-foam lace
reach up for a moon
pinned impossibly high,
while the woods settle in
to the bed of the earth
with a shrug and a yawn and a sigh.
Then you lean into me
as I reach out for you
and we bid all the specters good bye,
 at the edge of a world
where the nightmares are curled
and the stars fall away from the sky.


Over in the Imaginary Garden Hedgewitch asked us to write a piece in keeping with the Tonalist painting movement, "with 'no under drawing,' by tkaing an idea, a place, a persn, an event or a mood and quickly fleshing out a portrait of it in a blur of words.  Use language to mass light and dark verbal'tones' and build up our poem in dashes of description and image. The end result should be something immediate but 'misty.'  Or we could use a painting from this school to inspire our writing.  I'm not sure I achieved that first bit, so the painting is one from the Tonalist School. 




27 comments:

  1. Nice piece Mary...for myself the more "controled" or "restricted" the terms are for prompts such as this the more contrived I feel when writing and reading what I create

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  2. Mary, this is lovely, and I do think that you have done a little bit of both here--the poem feels fresh and immediate, the mood and the events or feelings are expressed visually, and it all falls into a misty sort of focus. Thanks very much for participating!.

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  3. Hi Mary,
    You had me humming an old nursery rhyme, and that can't be bad! I see a specter with yellow eyes rising out of the mist. Twas the mood you set. Well done.

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  4. Into the mist the unknown can spur

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  5. I thought this was something soft and romantic but when it came to the curling of nightmares and stars falling out, it was an unexpected turn ~ Well done Mary ~

    Grace

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  6. Love this - such a powerful write :)

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  7. The ending surprised me. I love it, Mary.

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  8. Oh, this is very beautiful! Loved it!

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  9. This is lovely and puts me in mind of that song, Into the Mystic. Nice work. Spencer is Kanzensakura

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  10. Nicely executed in response to the prompt.

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  11. Mary, the mood reigns in this one. I love Whistler's work in this period of his work and you have recreated it in this poem. (Google won't let me respond with my Wordpress acct :0( )

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  12. This has such beautiful music, which mirrors the sentiment just perfectly. Lovely.

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  13. This ties so well into the picture, and I simply love those curling nightmares that feels both menacing and safe at the same time.

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  14. Perfect response to the challenge! That water's edge before sleep is drawn so plush here.

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  15. So well penned! It feels like floating on "sea-foam lace" and leaving the edge of a scary world behind with the one you love..... so romantic

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  16. luv, luv, the musicality of this poem, its is such a beautiful read aloud

    much love...

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  17. Magical filled with rhythm and love.

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  18. Mary, you had me fall into this pen - it feels fresh and yet classic, a difficult task, yet fruitful, you've done so well ~

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  19. Those last two lines feel like the beginning to something more...intriguing and very visual piece...nicely done, Mary!

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  20. What a beautiful voice for the painting...

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  21. Then you lean into me
    as I reach out for you
    and we bid all the specters good bye...

    These lines really speak to me. beautiful descriptive work.

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  22. Oceans of emotions
    do storm outside
    nightmares
    so grey
    do reign inside..
    Moon oh moon..
    how do you escape..
    so bright so light
    a
    way
    as
    sea
    scape..:)

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  23. I love the idea of reaching up for a moon pinned impossibly high, which is how it feels when you are sleepy and are reaching to turn out the light, it's so FAR ... but the rest of the poem continues that languid cozy feeling.

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  24. This is just lovely, Mary. A beautiful love poem. K.

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