Sunday, December 30, 2012

Lucky Strike


     Image by R.A.D. Stainforth 

I remember
gentle pressure of your lips.
Friction, spark, fire:
you ignite,
I burn.

But that’s past.
Turns out the brass ring
was only smoke.

A stale future
permeates my clothes and hair.

Ashes,ashes,we all fall down.

Check out more responses to the picture by R.A.D. Stainforth at The Mag weekly, online writing prompt provided by Tess Kincaid.

39 comments:

  1. Ooh, I like this. Excellent capture. Perfect last line!

    ReplyDelete
  2. you ignite, i burn...nice...and then, oy not really...only smoke...nice end as well on the familiar rhyme...

    ReplyDelete
  3. Replies
    1. Thanks Pat - wow, you didn't even rhyme!

      Delete
  4. LOVED the whole thing, and the ending is perfect! It starts out so gentle... and then spirals and bursts! nicely done.

    ReplyDelete
  5. So often we try to catch the brass ring of life, and then it turns out to be only smoke...

    ReplyDelete
    Replies
    1. Yes, too often. Good quiz by the way B.

      Delete
  6. The brass ring was only smoke...sadly all too often...

    ReplyDelete
    Replies
    1. Sadly yes. Thanks for the prompt Tess.

      Delete
  7. Brilliant Mag offering here, my girl. Go to the top of the class!

    ReplyDelete
  8. Another relationship going up in smoke - creative likening!

    ReplyDelete
  9. Even the brass ring is only smoke..do we ever learn? Amazing!

    ReplyDelete
    Replies
    1. Apparently not Lyn. Thanks for reading.

      Delete
  10. This would go well with a lot of black kohl eyeliner.

    ReplyDelete
    Replies
    1. Hey Mary - here's to all the best to you in 2013!

      Delete
  11. Sometimes what starts out ablaze burns out quick....love this one Mary! Hope you have a Happy New Year! :-)

    ReplyDelete
    Replies
    1. Thank you Carrie - and Happy New Year to you!

      Delete
  12. smokin good indeed....nicely writtena and thanks for sharing

    ReplyDelete
    Replies
    1. Thank you Wayne, I'm glad you 'stopped by.'

      Delete
  13. Realization of impermanence permeates through me..like smoke... more I read this, the more I like it!

    ReplyDelete
  14. Ah yes ... we all fall down.

    Happy New Year, Mary!!!!

    ReplyDelete
  15. This is a wonderful write! Excellent!

    Anna :o]

    ReplyDelete
  16. All gratuitous things must come to an end, i suppose. Happy new year, Mary

    ReplyDelete
    Replies
    1. Happy New Year and thanks! Sorry I didn't see this sooner!

      Delete
  17. This has me thinking back.I was a smoker for about 15 years and am remembering the senses that were involved.

    ReplyDelete
    Replies
    1. I was never a smoker, but also didn't mind it. But I did dislike the stale, day after smell that would attach to my hair after a night out.

      Delete
  18. gritty. grim. real. love the ending.

    ReplyDelete