Thank you all. I won't make a separate comment to each of you here, but have read and commented on your work at your own blogs. I appreciate your reading and responses.
i wonder how many times we regret rushing in despite the red flag...or how many times we overlook the red flag...interesting interpretation on a frenetic image
You seem to appreciate, perhaps instinctively, that your commas after "darkness" and "chaos" are a necessary part of the closing cadence. They force pauses which amount - almost - to extra syllables, never mind the subtle changes they bring to the meaning of the lines. Punctuation-free free verse word-sprayers take note.
Your heart looks like an apple
ReplyDeleteDoes it go good with snapple?
that first stanza is a wonderful poem in and of itself. well done!
ReplyDeleteBeautifully said, Mary. Like Susan, I love the first stanza.
ReplyDeleteK
brilliant,
ReplyDeleteyou are getting better and better.
That's what love seems to be..you captured it...
ReplyDeleteBeautiful! Love can be chaotic, but we surge ahead anyway.
ReplyDeleteLovely!!!!!!!!
ReplyDeleteLovely write indeed!
ReplyDeleteJJRod'z
Like this a lot. In spite of the red flag...how often we do things despite just that.
ReplyDeleteand that is love...willing to dare that unknowing...knowing it could turn out many different ways...nice mary...
ReplyDeleteIndeed, love conquers all - even darkness. :)
ReplyDeleteyes, what everyone else said. i love giving hearts.
ReplyDeleteThank you all. I won't make a separate comment to each of you here, but have read and commented on your work at your own blogs. I appreciate your reading and responses.
ReplyDeleteAnd the final stanza is exactly what Kandinsky was doing with his painting, so - brilliant!
ReplyDeleteThank you Dave. I appreciate it.
DeleteThe middle stanza pushed together nicely.
ReplyDeleteThank you, I was pleased with that phrase.
Deletei wonder how many times we regret rushing in despite the red flag...or how many times we overlook the red flag...interesting interpretation on a frenetic image
ReplyDeleteThanks Tom!
DeleteLove the first stanza especially.
ReplyDelete=)
I give you my heart .. love how that meshes with the red spot!
ReplyDeleteThanks Helen :o)
ReplyDeleteGood poem, thanks for it!
ReplyDeletehttp://wanderwithoutbeinglost.blogspot.com/2012/01/today.html
Thank you Wander. Nice of you to stop by!
DeletePushing back the edge of darkness; that's pretty much what we all do, isn't it?
ReplyDeleteHi Berowne. At least we try to push back the darkness. Thanks for the comment :o)
DeleteThe very definition of giving love...terrific!
ReplyDeleteThank you Lyn!
DeleteWho wouldn't like a bright storm of love? LOL
ReplyDeleteThank you Trell, I do like that phrase.
Deletewonderful Mary - what happens when the checkered flag falls?
ReplyDeleteOh - then the race is on! lol, thanks Isabel.
DeleteYou seem to appreciate, perhaps instinctively, that your commas after "darkness" and "chaos" are a necessary part of the closing cadence. They force pauses which amount - almost - to extra syllables, never mind the subtle changes they bring to the meaning of the lines. Punctuation-free free verse word-sprayers take note.
ReplyDeleteThanks Doc - I tried it with and without, and found I needed the commas. I'm glad you concur.
DeleteSuperb!
ReplyDeleteAnna :o]
Thank you Anna...your spider makes me smile :o)
DeleteI love love love this!!!
ReplyDelete